neil

As we get older, many of us start thinking of the possibility of retirement.

In solidarity with our colleagues in Hollywood, we are considering walking off the job.

We used to be used to delayed gratification.

I grew up in an age of transistor radios.

Without the help of all those working behind the scenes and several who worked in front of the scenes…

Hello, you’ve reached the voicemail of Neil Offen.

Well, having money helps, of course. Research has shown that it’s much better than not having money.

I don’t think I particularly fall down any more often than other people my age who fall down on a semi-regular basis.

It’s true of all of us, that we occasionally can’t remember stuff: where we put the house keys, if we left the water running in the bathtub or the Pythagorean theorem.

I admit it: I still have a VCR. And several audio cassettes.

It’s not just our bodies that can get out of shape, our brains can get flabby, too.

When all the technology we had was a landline and a transistor radio, our bills were simple.

We are installing a new operating system. Please do not shut down this website during the process.

Have you ever had to go to the emergency room, the ER? Don’t worry if you haven’t; you will.

In these days of endless COVID, we are not alone in sometimes feeling alone.

It’s not always enough just to have a complex, inscrutable password.

’Twas the night before Christmas…

Even with COVID, the average American lifespan is still 77 years, which is an increase of almost two years from just a few decades ago.

Now that we’ve made it through Thanksgiving, our thoughts naturally turn to improving our diets.

Like many of us of a certain age, I thought enrolling in Medicare would be easy.

This is a true story.

You’ve tried Post-it notes, mnemonic devices, mindfulness and slapping your forehead with the palm of your hand.

After screwing up the world for the last 50 years or so, baby boomers are no longer lead players in our culture.

It’s getting to be that time of year again, when our inboxes and mailboxes are flooded with solicitations from health insurance companies.

Been to the gym lately?

Yes, most of the time, we Google an answer.

Eat more of this, eat less of that. Or maybe it’s eat more of that and eat less of this.

Why do you say “frequently asked questions” rather than FAQs?

People are traveling again.

Not that long ago, I considered running a half marathon.

What’s the most difficult part of adapting to our new high-tech world if you’re pretty much an old-tech person?

In a discussion the other day at the gym with my personal trainer, I asked one very obvious question: What am I doing with a personal trainer? What are any of us doing with a personal trainer?

That is, like many of those in my generation, I am trying to remain as youthful as possible and hold on to my youthful past.

Who among us doesn’t have a roster something like this?

As we age, we gain a number of things — wisdom, weight and, of course, prescriptions.

Have you been forgetting things lately, like where your glasses are or the names of your children?

During this period of prolonged isolation, enforced quarantine and abundant Cheetos, have you been gaining weight?

I’m sorry, could you repeat that?

In honor of Valentine’s Day, let’s talk about marriage. How do you stay married for a long time?